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Dr Nancy Buck

Sorry for my delay in answering.
It sounds like you’re on a good track! And you can discuss with your kiddos “How do you want me to handle it if you don’t follow through on your chore? I don’t want to be a nagging mom, nor do I want to resort to withholding privileges. Let’s make a plan ahead of time so we all know what to expect, ok?”

As parents, we want to teach our children the “3 Rs” of daily expectations:
Here they are 3 Rs:
R=relationships that are respectful, kind and connected. The relationship are with all of the important people in your child’s life, from teacher, to best friend, to sousing, to parent and siblings. This also includes a child’s relationship with him/herself with proper eating, body, dietary and sleeping hygiene, etc.
R=responsibilities that include chores, school work, attending extra activities likes sports, or musical lessons etc.
R=right order and right choices. Brushing your teeth before consuming breakfast wouldn’t be the right order, for example. Playing a video game before completing school homework wouldn’t be the right order or the right choice is another example.

When your child successfully and regularly completes his/her 3Rs, then extras make sense. Or, stated from a choice theory point of view, it doesn’t make sense for parents to grant additional freedom until you child demonstrates that he/she can manage his/her present level of freedom. Extras are what you all decide they are and include the privilege of additional and unusual freedom.

What do you think? Please share your feedback and questions.


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